Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
