I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
