Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
