I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
