Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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