No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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