I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize