Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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