He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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