I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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