Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize