How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
