U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
