I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
