We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
