margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Randomize
