I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
