He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
