He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I am full of burrito and curiosity
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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