I wish I only lived at night.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Dick very happy bro
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
