Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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