i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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