The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
