you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
God I need to hump something, right now.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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