I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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