What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
