he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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