We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
