I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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