he shaved USA in his pubs
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
