NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Less talking, more tequila
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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