i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
