So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
