She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
