She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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