these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
not ubering you a puppy
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
