Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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