so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize