she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
