yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize