Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
