Fuck appropriateness.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
