If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
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