Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
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