How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
