dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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