Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
someone owes me an orgasm
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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