If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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