Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
