Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
