i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
